WCW Week 5 - Aftermath of Slamboree

Nitro
We get a recap package for Slamboree, then we go to Kanyon's hospital room with Page sat beside. Then come in Bischoff, Cat, Awesome and Jarrett with balloons. Bischoff pretends to cry and Page immediately elbows him in the face before going after the other three, until Cat breaks a picture frame over his head, beating him up using a food tray an a crutch until Kimberly tells them they need to get to Nitro, leaving Page laid out on the neighboring bed. Kimberly grabs Kanyon's bedpan and says he's not looking too good, dumping it's contents on him before leaving. Then to the arena, the MC bus is pulling into the arena and out they come. Then onto the opening video and pyro.

We're live from the Trans World Dome in St. Louis, Missouri. Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden and Scott Hudson welcome us to the show as always, then out comes the New Blood led by Bischoff, including David Arquette. Hospital must be right next door to the arena for Eric and co. to make it back that quickly. Despite the boos, Eric says he loves them too, and that they had a hell of a night the night before, the new WCW Champion and his man David Arquette, all brought to you by the producers of the New Blood, and the director who brought one of the greatest swerves of all time. Then Bischoff plays us footage of how this all started, and Bischoff narrates it, basically telling us this was all a swerve from the moment Arquette attacked Bischoff to set up their match. He says he told Page before that Bischoff can set him up, screw him, and walk away from it and he'd never see it coming, just like the morons in the arena, and all the internet wrestling experts who thought it was such a disgrace to put the title on Arquette. He says he did it for one reason: to screw Page royally. 

Arquette gets the mic now and does the most cringeworthy "shut up" I've ever seen, then apologizes to Page, then to Kanyon, but they should know better than to trust someone from Hollywood. He says when he was on the set with Page, he told him he had a dream to be a wrestler, and Page said "shapaaaaaaaaap" and said he'd get hurt, but instead Page got hurt. He says he was the Heavyweight Champion of the World, thanks to his buddy Eric Bischoff, the king, Easy E, then tells him to put that in his corn pipe and smoke it.

Jarrett takes the mic now and says that once again he's the Chosen One, and asks if Page really thought he could beat him in the Triple Cage, before calling him a slap ass and saying he couldn't beat Jarrett on his worst day, that he was had, he's a fool, no wonder his wife left his stupid ass. Then we see Page pulling into the arena and Kimberly gets on the mic, saying this is what makes him so ignorant and  that all of this is about her and Eric agrees. Awesome takes the mic now who has a quick question for Page: How's it going to feel for the next 50 years taking care of his puke, jump-ass friend Kanyon? 

Page's music finally hits and out he comes to save this segment I hope and he immediately rushes the ring, going after Awesome as everyone else exits. Cat comes back in and gets tossed out, leaving Arquette to take a Diamond Cutter. Then Jarrett, Cat and Awesome come back in and attack, until the lights go out and Sting's music hits. He suddenly appears to help even things up, clearing the ring. Then more New Blood rush out until Kronic comes out too. Page's music hits once again leaving him and company alone in the ring, they pose a bit then leave before commercial.

Back from break, Gene is with Eric and co., who says since Page wants to hit one of the finest actors in Hollywood with a Diamond Cutter, he's going to have a Stretchers Match with Mike Awesome tonight. Now for Sting, since he wants Jarrett, Bischoff's going to give him Jarrett. Gene asks if the World Title will be on the line and Eric says absolutely, much to the chagrin of Jarrett, and as much as Jarrett protests, Eric says it'll be fine and to trust him.

Then we see Norman and Ralphus walking backstage, with Norman telling him they can't mess around, and if they can't beat Funk tonight, they're fired, then they go out to the ring for that match.

Handicap Match for the WCW Hardcore Championship: Terry Funk (c) vs Norman Smiley & Ralphus
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: I mean this was a horrible match at the PPV but if they keep this under 5 minutes, it should be perfectly fine. They've proven they're capable of booking short hardcore matches. Funk comes out with chair in hand, while Tony tells us the Stretcher Match will be at the top of the hour. Then we get the same Funk video package we got from Slamboree. Funk gets a mic and says Bischoff and Russo will never get that title off his wrinkled, old ass, and calls out his challengers. Norman comes out with a mic, and Ralphus with a chair, and says he wants to present his new, hardcore, tag team partner, the man who single handedly at Slamboree told us all why we should all say no to crack, Monday Night Ralphus. Funk cracks Ralphus in the head twice with the chair on the ramp and the bell is rung.
Ralphus just falls as Norman hops down to the floor, then Funk throws a chair at his back, then down at Norman. Funk with right hands  now and into the guard rail, then over it. Noman fights back with a trash can to the head, then a railing, then another, then a trash can, then another railing. Funk thrown into a ladder before Norman chases Funk with a golf cart until Funk sidesteps and Norman keeps driving in a circle. Norman throws water bottles at Funk then drives away, Funk climbs on back and they drive into a random pile of milk crates. Norman throws some at him and they fight into the kitchen. Cookie sheets to the head back and forth, then Ralphus and Funk go at it, and Ralphus accidentally clocks Norman as he swings back. Funk falls, Ralphus stumbles around, then tries to block sheet shots until Funk knocks them down, hammering away with the cookie sheet. Funk covers them both even though Norman's on his side and Ralphus is on top and retains the title in 3:47. Never mind, it seems to be pure luck when they book a hardcore match properly.

Norman and Ralphus weep and cry as Funk and the ref walk off, then back to commentary. Tony tells us that Kanyon is, quote "fighting for his own existence" in a hospital bed. Scott tells us Kanyon suffered severe trauma to the spinal cord, specifically the C5, C6 and C7 vertebrae, he can't walk, he has no feeling from the waist down and don't know if it's permanent, but do know that he'll be a changed man and wrestler for the rest of his life. Tony reminds us of the Stretcher Match, then of David and Ric's issues from last night, while Mark tells us Russo is David's father now. We cut to the parking lot where Flair is with Liz and Luger, telling them it's his son and he has to go out and do this himself, then heads off into commercial.

Back from the break, as promised out comes Flair by himself, but in his hand he has the NWA World Heavyweight Championship, then we get stills from last night's Flair/Douglas match, along with the post-match shenanigans. He says in 1978, Funk told him that if he wanted to be a star in the business, he had to get to St. Louis on Friday night, that he had to be at the Kiel, live at the Chase, he had to be in St. Louis to be a star. Then he saw the NWA Title for the first time, around the waist of the legendary Jack Brisco, and he asked him if he thought Flair could ever be World Champion, to which he said keep working, work at it, every day, every night, and maybe by the grace of God, he might get it some day. Then it was Funk, then it was Harley Race, then Dusty Rhodes, and then it was his turn. He says the NWA Title is what they all desired to have and be the World Heavyweight Champion, gave up everything, life, family, worked every day, partied all night, they were the champions of the world, the best the sport has to offer. Now it goes away, and he holds up a WCW World Title belt, a copy of what Jarrett's wearing now, but it was his before, he says Jarrett knows it and he loves being the champion. He says he might not like it, but Jarrett is the man because he has the World Title and there's only one. He says they died and lived and breathed and sweat and bled to be the champ, and he's not retiring, but last night, all of that, all the glory, notoriety came to an end when his son made the mistake of a lifetime. He says David has guts he didn't think he had, and says he's not mad for what David did, but wants him to come out and tell everyone he made a mistake, that he wants to be David Fliehr and not David Flair, that he wants to be with his father not Ric Flair, and come out and make it right by Ric.

On cue and without music, out comes David with an "I <3 NY" t-shirt, alongside Daphne with a mini-Statue of Liberty in her hand. Then Russo's music hits and out he comes with a bat and mic, then they walk down to the ring together. Russo says they're making t-shirts now, and they say "Tradition sucks," and last night in Kansas City, "Missoura," as he's sure that's how the hicks say it, he spit in the face of tradition. He pulls out a piece of paper, a list of the people whose faces he spit in: Dory Funk Jr., Dick the Bruiser, Jack Brisco, Kiniski, DiBiase, Murdoch, Brody, Dusty Rhodes and St. Louis' own Sam Muchnick. Flair tries to cut him and off and say he's here to talk to David, but Russo yells at him to let him finish, then says that more importantly he looked right in Flair's face and spit square in his eye, and now his son is standing next to the father he never had. He and David embrace.

Flair tells David that for whatever Russo, as he calls him a nothing happening punk, has made him think that he can be, it's not going to happen. He says they had this discussion a year ago when he got in the business, they would manipulate him, pull him aside, work every possible angle to make this happen, they want reality, they want the Flairs split down the middle, but it ain't gonna happen and it'll never happen, then tells David to walk over to him. 

David takes the mic from Russo and says he's mad at Ric, then Russo takes it back and says he has every reason to be mad. Ric says they'll talk about it when they get home, that they aren't going to air anything personal on this show, and tells him to come home to him. Russo again now says he sees the Great American Bash, Baltimore, Ric's backyard, he sees Father vs Son, 21 years in the making. Ric says he's not going to look at Russo anymore as he turns back to David, says he's his son and isn't going to wrestle him anywhere, that David's going to work his way from the bottom up just like Ric did, he's going to bleed and sweat and pay the price, be what they raised him to be, not a punk stooge for Russo, then tells him to walk over again.

David repeats that he's mad at Ric, then Ric repeats not to air personal grievances on this show, and Ric pulls out his cellphone, says if David walks over, he'll call Vince McMahon and David will be on Raw next Monday, pointing out that Russo's burned that bridge, saying David will be a big star. David goes over and hugs Ric much to Russo's chagrin, then Ric takes his jacket as he turns around, ready to fight Russo. Ric takes his watch back and corners him, only for David to smash the mini statue over his head. David now choking Ric before mocking his strut. David raises the two titles over his head, while Russo stands over Ric, saying they'll see him at the Bash. Russo jumps into David's arm with arm raised as his music hits, then Russo takes the watch back before they leave the ring and go to commercial.

Back from break we get a replay of the attack before the break, then to the parking lot where Ric has got his bag packed and ready to leave, Lex there with Liz by his side telling him to snap out of it, but Ric has had it with the business, and keeps yelling it as his limo drives off.

Out to the arena, Luger's music and video play but out comes Chuck Palumbo, now going by "The Main Event" Chuck Palumbo, who comes out doing Luger's track suit ripoff gimmick and posing in the ring before getting a mic. He introduces himself after telling the fans to calm down, 6'5", 280 lbs, 3, not 4% body fat, saying he's the total package and so much more. He's pissed at Lex, over the fact that he's still standing after beating his ass the night before, then calls him out, saying he's gonna light him up, give him the beating he should have given him the night before, finish him off.

Luger comes out with Liz by his side, but tells her to stay back as he enters the ring. Lex right away on the offense with rights and clotheslines and forearms. Then R&B Security come out to take Liz back as Lex knocks Chuck out of the ring. He knocks security before Chuck clocks him with a muscle flexer, knocking him out. They all take Liz back as Lex's music hits and we go to commercial.

Back from break, commentary tell us Lex is still unconscious last they were told, and we go to the back where he's being loaded into the ambulance. Then we go outside Russo's office, who kicks out everyone but Daffney and Liz. He says he has no idea what Liz is doing and that he's trying real hard and doing this for her, that he chose her because she's not like the others and trying to help her, but she keeps fighting and he's getting tired of it, so she's going to live up to the contract tonight by taking on Daffney, the psycho bitch from hell as he calls her. She starts begging and wants out, and he tells her if she can beat Daffney, he'll rip up the contract and she can go with Luger, but if not, it'll only get worse, before handing her some gear. She heads to the bathroom to change as Daffney laughs maniacally.

Back to the arena, Stasiak is already in the ring for our next match. He gets a mic first though to run down St. Louis, bringing up how it's the home of Mark McGuire, that the difference between him, McGuire and all the other wannabes in the crowd is that he doesn't need to put any cork in his bat, and the ladies know exactly what he's talking about, because he's the home run king and is absolutely the Perfect One.

"The Perfect One" Shawn Stasiak vs Captain Rection (w/ Curt Hennig)
Quick back and forth until Rection is caught with an elbow, reverses off the ropes but nails some clotheslines. Corner punches by Rection, then Shawn sent across the ring into a corner splash. Ms Hancock appears on the stage as Hennig appears to be holding Shawn in the corner, but then as Rection goes for another splash, Hennig actually pulls Shawn out of the way, Shawn hits the Hennig-Plex for the win in 1:09.

MIA suddenly rush the ring and now Nash for... reasons, stopping Shawn as he tries to go to the back, sending him back in the ring. Stasiak off the ropes into a big boot and a jackknife. Nash gets a mic as Stasiak rolls out and calls out to Russo, and asks what he was smoking the night before, saying it had to be chronic to hit him with a bat. He says a funny thing about life is that Vince didn't kill him, so now he's gotta face him tonight. He says he doesn't know what happened to the quiet Vince Jr. he knew in WWF, he thought they were friends, and was one of the guys who helped get Russo back there, but since he wants to play, he'll play. He says to take his hand, grab his balls and come down. 

Instead though, out comes Kidman, Torrie, Konnan and Rey, so I guess the Filthy Animals are back together as commentary points out. Kidman's got a mic and says it's time Nash learns his place in the pecking order, and right now he's the low man on the scrotum pole. He says Russo is way too busy dealing with the real stars, like the Kid, to worry about a broken down, has-been, washed up old wrestler like him. He says though that he cut down one giant the night before, proving once again that bigger isn't always better, and would be more than happy to do it again, because he is the Kid, and that kid don't play. Um, didn't he lose at the PPV?

Konnan takes the mic and says screw Nash and screw the Wolfpack, while Nash does the spooky fingers and has the perfect face as Konnan says this.

He says Nash thought the Filthy Animals were done for because Konnan got suspended and Rey got hurt, but they're back and tighter than ever, and they don't care that Nash and the old billy goats Cliq held them back, all that matters is who's gonna pay and in what order, and tells Nash to be ready to toss their salads and peel their potatoes...?

Anyway they rush the ring and Nash lays in with rights until Rey nails him in the leg with a bat, then Hogan's music hits and they get the hell out of there. Nash gets the mic again as they retreat up the walkway, and says that what they don't understand is that when you're on top of the mountain, it's hard for punks like them to knock them off. He calls them his little bitches and tells them to listen up, then challenge them to a St. Louis Street Fight tonight.  Hogan gets the mic and says he and big Kev are gonna go in the back, take a Russo and wipe their Bischoff, and then beat the shit out of the three of them, then Hogan's music hits as the other four head to the back. 

Up next is the Stretcher Match, and we see Page wheeling a stretcher out to the ring before the break.

Back from commercial, before we get to our match Bischoff and Kimberly make their way out to the ring for a grand entrance, but they join commentary as we get to the match.

Stretcher Match: Diamond Dallas Page vs Mike Awesome
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: He comes out without the stretcher for... some reason. Bischoff says that one way or another the divorce papers will be signed one way or another after this match, and we see a stretcher just left in the middle of the entrance arch as Mike comes out, who carries it down to the ring. I'm not sure how this match actually works, I mean normally the rules go that you wheel your opponent across a finish line on the stretcher, but this is WCW, so....
Anyways, Page goes after Mike right away as he steps through the ropes with right hands and a clothesline, then goes over the ropes with him. Mike face first off the announce table, then the guard rail, then gets whipped into it himself. Knee to the midsection of Mike then back in the ring, Mike stomping away. Page now choked over the middle rope, Page sent off the ropes but catches him in a Uranagi. Missing rights, Page off the ropes and they nearly botch a headscissor take down. Tony does explain that the rules are actually fairly similar to what I said above, so that's good at least. Clothesline by Page now, then a terrible DDT. Kimberly has had enough and holds up the divorce papers on the apron, he takes them and rips them up, until Mike hits him in the face with a chair twice.  Mike now with mounted rights, then a horrible looking DDT on the chair. Mike nails another bad looking DDT on the chair before rolling Page out to the walkway, Page has been opened up as he's pulled onto the stretcher. Referees start to roll him toward the back but Page gets off the stretcher.
Bischoff pulls out a table and hands it to Awesome as Page gets back to the ring, while Mike sets up the table. Mike swings with the chair and misses, but connects on the second try, then puts him through the table with a powerbomb. Bischoff walks in with the paper pieces and grabs Page's hand, forcing him to sign the divorce papers. Mike calls for the stretcher again before rolling Page out once again, onto the stretcher once more. Referees wheel him to the back and the bell is rung, Awesome gets the win in 6:31.

Awesome celebrates with Bischoff and Kimberly, then we cut immediately to a hallway where Steiner is with his girls when Russo walks up, asking for help since Nash is looking to kill him, asking him to talk sense into Nash. Steiner gets in his face and tells him he doesn't have to do anything, he does what he wants to do when he wants to do it, and threatens to break Russo's arms if he puts his hands on Steiner again, and he wouldn't last two seconds in this sport before he and the ladies walk off into commercial.

Back from break, now Russo has turned to Tank Abbott and we can't hear anything as Russo just punches a metal gate a few times and they walk off. Then we go to Gene who's with Jarrett, who asks if he's going to insult him again, and sure enough he calls him Slap Nuts. Gene brings up Jarrett's reaction from earlier when he found out he had to defend the title, and Jarrett says he's going to smack Sting around like a pinata with his guitar, with or without Russo or Bischoff's help, because he's the Chosen One and the WCW Champion. Gene thanks him, Jarrett says he's welcome while calling him a Jurassic slap ass. Jarrett starts to walk off, and Gene starts to tell him to blow it out his ass but Jarrett quickly gets in his face to cut him off.

Back to the arena, out comes Steiner with his ladies and of course he gets a mic. He says at Slamboree he wrestled one of the Misfits in Action, now known as Hugh G. Rection, and after he beat the hell out of him, he took his two freak back to the hotel and found himself one. He says his freaks have always told him size does matter, and he's the biggest of them all, and as he took them to the mountain top, and they found Nirvanna, and as they were about to reach the summit, they said to him "Oh god. Oh god." and they called him the daddy, the Big Bad Bootay Dadday. He says that being the Genetic Freak, he's a mountain of a man, and calls Booker nothing but an amoeba because he has no backbone, that he had his chance to wrestle him at Slamboree but he has no balls, and calls him out. Instead what he gets from behind with a low blow is Tank Abbott, who lays into Steiner with right hands, knocking him out, and Tank leaves as the ladies check on Steiner. They give us a replay, then to the back.

Gene is now with Sting, who says it's all really good for him, and really really bad for Jarrett, Bischoff and Russo, that he knew it would be a matter of time before all of them made a stupid mistake and they made it tonight by putting the gold up for grabs. He says their fearless leader Jarrett is going to drop the ball, Sting is gonna pick it up, run with it and score a touchdown. He tells Jarrett to bring his guitar and says it's showtime before walking off.

Fatal 4-Way Tag Team Elimination Match: The Harris Brothers (Ron & Don) vs The Mamalukes (Vito & Johnny the Bull) (w/ Disco Inferno) vs Harlem Heat 2000 (Stevie Ray & Big T) (w/ J. Biggs & Kash) vs Kronic
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: So Kronic came out wearing the tag belts, and I had to go back and make sure I didn't make a mistake after that mess of a Thunder episode, where they did beat Buff and Shane, but it was a non-title match, so it seems they just stole the titles after that match. Based on what commentary tell us I guess the point of this is to try and beat them for the titles they don't actually own? Sure enough, the actual champions come out, and the bell rings in the middle of Buff's fancy entrance.
This is basically a handicap match as they all turn their attention to Kronic but they make short work of everyone, leaving them with the Harris Brothers. Shane and Buff join commentary as they take on one Harris, one of Kronic with a clothesline off the middle rope. Then we cut to Steiner throwing chairs around backstage, then back to the ring where Harlem Heat are back in the fight, then the Mamalukes. The numbers game starts to get to Kronic as one is scoop slammed and Vito nails a top rope elbow, then Vito, Stevie and a Harris all fight for a cover. Vito gets hit with an F5, covered and eliminated.
Rock Bottom on a Harris from one of Kronic, cover and Harris Brothers are out. Buff and Shane leave commentary to join in to make it 4 on 2, but quickly get ejected from the ring, but then Kash is in and hit a Bryan with a double slapjack. Kash misses a corner splash and sent to the outside, then Stevie lays out T with a slapjack before deciding to just leave. Kronic nail Big T with High Time while we see Buff has snagged the tag belts back, and Kronic win in 4:36. Fucking hell what a confusing mess.

Steiner runs down and lays out the tag champs with clotheslines, then a side suplex on Kash. Kronic take back the tag titles as Steiner gets the mic and calls Russo a New York son of a bitch, that Russo might think he pulls the strings, but his ass isn't leaving until he gets Tank Abbott. Steiner tosses a chair into the ring and takes a seat, then tells Tank to stop gumming Russo in the back and get out there. Then says he and Bischoff ain't shit, then we see Tank in the back telling Doug Dillinger he wants this done right and not to screw this up, whatever that is before it goes to commercial.

Back from break, Steiner is still waiting and... Well for some reason Goldberg's music hits... Oh, that's what Tank was on about, because he does a poor man's Goldberg entrance with R&B Security flanking him to the ring. Wow that was pathetic, but I suppose it doesn't need to be good. Steiner goes right after him with knees, then Tank with rights but Steiner with a belly to belly and elbows to the back. Spinning belly to belly and more fists and elbows, now a crossface on Tank. More elbows to the side of the head and... Rick Steiner now out from the crowd to try and pull him off. Now the double team on Steiner and Tank knocks out Steiner. There's a referee there calling for the bell for... some reason as they lay into Steiner and they leave the ring.

We cut to Russo in the back yelling at Steiner through a monitor not to cross the boss, then goes to get Liz for her match up next, then goes to another door to tell someone to be on standby before commercial.

Back from break we get a replay of what Tank and Rick did before the break, then to our... "match."

Elizabeth vs Daffney
If Liz wins, she's free from Russo.
Liz smacks Daffney in the face, then a couple of hair biels, then choking in the corner. Then... Medusa comes from behind and shoves Liz in the corner, and... the bell is rung again. So... Liz wins by DQ in 39 seconds? What was the point of this?

Liz wants to get out but Medusa has her cornered, now Mona comes in to whip Medusa across the ring, a handspring back elbow and a bulldog, but Medusa gets her with a back suplex instead. Liz gets a chair now as Medusa gets Mona with spin kicks. Liz cracks Medusa in the back with the chair as she gets on Mona, then Liz leaves, only to be caught by R&B Security. Um, she won that match...

We cut to Nash and Hogan for their match up next.

St. Louis Street Fight: Kevin Nash & Hulk Hogan vs The Filthy Animals & Mike Awesome (w/ Torrie Wilson)
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: So Awesome comes out for this, and seeing as he's actually a wrestler and getting involved immediately, I guess he's part of this match too? 
Nash deals with Konnan and Rey easily while Hogan deals with Kidman and Awesome, and now suddenly Juventud Guerrera is out here. Juvie is over at commentary for... reasons as Awesome goes after Nash in the corner, then Nash rakes the eyes and they go out of the ring. Filthy Animals and Awesome retreat to the back and Hogan follows, while Juvie nails a missile dropkick on Nash taking him down. Hogan keeps chasing despite seeing what's going on and now we go to the back and Horace is there going after Awesome. The other three hide around the corner for Hogan with a bat and kendo stick before tossing Hogan in the trunk of a car before driving off, Horace giving chase. Back to the ring I guess Nash has beaten the crap out of Juvie and now nails a jackknife powerbomb and the referee calls for the bell. I don't fucking know, I guess a no contest in 2:29? In a fucking Street Fight no less. 

Nash stands tall and leaves the ring, then catch up with Kidman with Hogan in the trunk, and are about to leave the arena until Goldberg's monster truck pulls out in front of them and they run like hell, then to commercial.

Back from break, we get a replay of Hogan getting kidnapped and Goldberg's truck cutting them off. Then we go to present time where Hogan has escaped the trunk, then we go to the arena for our main event.

WCW World Heavyweight Championship: Jeff Jarrett (c) vs Sting
Jarrett tries to get the jump before the bell but Sting ducks and nails a clothesline of his own, then another off the ropes and a couple of hip tosses. Corner punches by Sting, Jeff sent across the ring and a Sting Splash attempt, but Jeff moves. Sting puts on the brakes though and clotheslins Jeff to the outside. Jarrett now face first into the guard rail, then again, then a suplex onto the walkway from the floor. Sting goes up top but misses a splash, hitting the walkway. Jarrett now with right hands taking advantage before he grabs a chair from ringside, into the ribs, then again, backing Sting up toward the stage, Jarrett celebrating early. Chair now into the back of Sting's leg, more celebrating by Jarrett, who charges all the way down the aisle and clotheslines Jeff into the ring, tumbling over with him.
Jarrett locks in the figure 4 and goes after the leg, Sting's shoulders get count down for a 2 count. Sting rallies the crowd as he fights through it and reverses the pressure, but Jarrett gets the ropes. Sting now with right hands, Jarrett into the corner and a successful Stinger Splash, then a second one. Sting gets Jarrett in the Scorpion Deathlock, but while commentary have apparently completely missed it, you can see someone cutting their way through the corner of the mat and out comes Vampiro, pulling Sting under the ring and sprays a fire extinguisher for.... some reason. Sting crawls back out with some help from Vamp and Sting has been given a bloodbath, Jarrett pins and retains in 5:35.

Jarrett celebrates as Vamp lays in with rights and headbutts and out come the rest of the New Blood to join in on the beat down. Buff with a bat and Nash's music hits and out he comes with Hogan. Buff and Shane try to cut them off but get laid out pretty easily. Then Konnan and Mike Awesome, then Stasiak and Palumbo, then Candido. We cut outside to Goldberg's monster truck running over a car as we just barely see Tank and Rick getting out of the way, so this is presumably there car now getting repeatedly run over. The truck gets stuck on top of the car as the show fades out.

OVERALL THOUGHTS
Sigh. What can I really say about this show? It was a mess all over. The only real highlights were Ric and Steiner's promos, and while some of the action was admittedly good, most of it had endless bullshit. Not to mention this show went about 15 minutes longer than usual, clocking in at 1:46:43, with only 24:46 of total wrestling. Let's just get Thunder over with.

Thunder
We get our recap package of Monday's Nitro, then our opening video and pyro, where we go live to the Prairie Capital Convention Center in Springfield, Illinois, with Schiavone Tenay and Heenan on commentary, and right away we get a title match.

WCW Cruiserweight Championship: "Hard Knox" Chris Candido (c) (w/ Tammy Sytch) vs Crowbar (w/ Daffney)
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: Candido takes the mic for a change, and says that ever since Tammy's joined him, his hard knocks life has gotten a hell of a lot easier, but remind them, while calling a particular fan a fat slob, that they can look but not touch. Tammy takes the mic and says she knows she can be a real tease sometimes, but if ya got it, flaunt it, and of course that's what she does. Crowbar comes out, oddly enough, with a lead pipe, who's met on the apron by Crowbar, but gets sent face first into the turnbuckle instead to start this match.
Crowbar now with rights and chops into the corner, then sent across the ring, boots up as Candido follows into a... well something like a reverse hurricanrana I suppose. Crowbar face first into the corner after a thumb to the eye, sent across the ring and tries to go up and over but Candido catches him on his shoulder, until Crowbar slips free, waistlock and lift but Candido slips out now, Crowbar ducks a back elbow, goes for a Northern Lights but Candido drops down into a DDT. Candido makes the cover for a two count.
Crowbar sent off the ropes, ducks a clothesline then nails a Death Valley Driver. Somersault into a leg drop from the apron from Crowbar, goes for the cover but Tammy's on the apron. Crowbar grabs him but Candido gets him from behind before back dropping him to the outside, then Candido with a slingshot crossbody. Tammy hands him a chair after rolling Crowbar back into the ring only to get it knocked back into his face with a baseball slide, followed by a splash off the apron by Crowbar. He sets up the chair and sits Candido down, back on the apron with a clothesline. Candido suplexes Crowbar onto the walkway from the ring then hip tosses him back in, Crowbar blocks a suplex with a front one of his own, cover and a near fall.
Dropkick in the corner, Candido lifted up top, goes for a hurricanrana but Candido nails a powerbomb instead. Candido up top now but Daffney comes in with a low blow and nails the Franken-screamer. Now Tammy's in for a fight with Tammy until Candido pulls her off, who walks right into Crowbar, but slips free to deliver a sitout tombstone. Candido up top now with a flying headbutt to retain in 4:52. It was an alright match, could have done with less interference though.

Candido stumbles out of the ring and we go immediately to commentary, who tell us Tenay did an interview with Vampiro that we'll see later on, who tells us the interview took some strange and shocking twists, plus footage of how Russo won over David Flair, and Liz is booked for another match against Rhonda Sing, the former Bertha Faye. Also tonight, Horace goes up against Konnan, and if Horace loses, he'll be fired, and an Ambulance Match between Mike Awesome and Sting in the main event.

To the back now, Bischoff is talking to Funk, with Kimberly and Cat by his side. Bischoff gives him the old hard way/easy way routine, saying he saw Beyond the Mat, that Funk shouldn't even be walking, let alone wrestling for the Hardcore Title, and suggests he make it easy on everybody and just hand over the title. Funk says he worked hard for that title and that Eric will have to cripple him to get it. Eric then tells him to name his price, saying he can still spend Turner's money like he always has, but Funk tells him to take his money and shove it up his ass, then walks off. Eric tells Cat to go get the Heat, and Cat points out that they have problems with themselves right now, but Eric says they can fix that.

To the outside, Tank and Rick have arrived, and Goldberg's monster truck is right behind as we go to commercial.

Back from break, we get into Russo's brainwashing of David Flair, as we see them in the streets of New York alongside Daffney and Crowbar, the latter getting excited by a poster for adult movies for a quarter, and David thinks they can go watch Ready to Rumble. Russo tells Daffney to go play in traffic, which... she does. Russo points out that there are  naked women inside, and David gets all excited, saying he's never seen a naked woman before, so Russo takes them inside. Meanwhile Daffney is dancing and singing in traffic, and a few seconds later, Russo and co. come back out all excited.

Back to the arena for another title match.

WCW Hardcore Championship: Harlem Heat 2000 (Stevie Ray, Big T) (w/ J. Biggs & Kash) vs Terry Funk (c)
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: J. Biggs comes out with a chair, while Kash has a trash can in hand. Ray gets a mic and calls out Funk and makes it short and sweet, saying the bosses want him to leave the strap with them, he was too stupid to do it, maybe too senile, and right now, they want a Hardcore Match, and where they come from, it means someone's gonna have to call Lifeline for his ass, and tells him to get his old, decrepit, booty-ass out there so they can stuff it in the trash can. Funk comes out without his title, but he does have two chickens for some reason.
Funk starts hitting them in the head with the chickens but Kash nails him in the back of the head with a trash can. T stomping away, Ray with forearms against the ropes and choking Funk. T goes out on the walkway as Ray holds up, diving over the ropes with a shoulder block. J. Biggs joins commentary as Ray nails a knee to the face of Funk. Scoop slam by Ray on Funk, T holds up Funk as Ray goes to the middle rope and nails a clothesline. Kash holds up Funk now who nails a right hand, then Ray and T send him off the ropes into a double Slapjack. Kash off the ropes with a splash, goes to cover but Ray wants it, so he covers and T wants it instead. Ray holds up Funk and T, but he... doesn't... for some reason... and then when he finally does Funk moves out of the way and it nails Ray instead. Oh I guess it was on purpose because then T drops Kash. Now Ray going at T near the corner as Funk grabs a chair, Kash getting thrown out onto the walkway. Funk nails Kash in the head with the chair, covers and retains in 3:21. Well that was a match. The live crowd seems to love Funk though.

Funk stumbles around very briefly before we cut right back to Bischoff, who's had enough of the old man. T and Ray keep fighting until refs come down to break it up while Funk celebrates at ringside into commercial.

Back from break, Schiavone brings us into Tenay's interview with Vampiro from earlier in the day. Tenay starts the interview by saying that, since they were supposed to learn more about Vampiro's personal life and such, that he's shown up to the interview in character, but Vamp says it's not a character, that he's been like this all his life. Tenay asks about the face paint and the tattoos, and Vamp says it was for two reasons, being that he's a big fan of underground music and hardcore punk rock, and because he was always ashamed of himself, felt he had to apologize to everyone for the way he was and always intimidated by everyone because he came from a poor family, and ashamed of people looking at his face, so he figured he'd give them something else to look at.

Tenay is confused and can't make sense of what he's saying, and Vamp retorts that it doesn't make sense why he has to be there and try and explain himself to someone who isn't going to get it anyways, and everyone else in WCW who's trying to figure out who he is, and get him to talk about why he does things, that he spent his whole life on the street being criticized and ridiculed for the way he looks and the things he believed in, while you have someone like Sting who's babied, paints his face, gets into character twice a week, and it's like another acting job and he's pampered, while Vamp has to be like that every day of his life is something that drives him crazy.

Tenay asks if he had any influences, be it in rock and roll or pro wrestling, and Vamp says he's had a lot and always thought it was great to mix the two together, and he starts to talk about the dark side of.... something, and he just doesn't complete his thought, moving back onto Sting, something about his schedules and trying to find time to come to work, and movie appointments, and taking care of his pets, and as he says this, he pulls the cover up over and I guess he's taken Sting's crow, which he so kindly tells us is Steve Borden's crow, now perched on Vamp's arm. He says he knows Sting is busy at home, gardening, babysitting his other pets or whatever, he knows he's never really got out of the house much, so he decides to enlighten Sting with a story about rock and roll, about the Ozzy Osbourne incident, which is something about biting the head off of a dove after signing a record deal, spitting it out on the executive's lap, and it bothered Vamp how it was never documented on film, and would like to recreate it somehow.

The crow starts to freak out and Tenay gets uneasy and leaves, just as Sting walks in and attacks, throwing Vamp around, hitting him with one of the lights. He says he's tired of Vamp's pity party and decides to have their first Cage Match, hitting Vamp in the back wit the bird cage. Vamp just laughs as Sting beats him up and calls him Ian, saying he doesn't want to ridicule him, that there's something about Vamp he kinda likes. He says he can show Vamp the way if he just listens to him, then walks off, Vamp laughs some more, and it goes to commercial. God, that was painful to watch. You could tell Vamp was not in the least bit comfortable doing any of that, he just looked so fucking awkward. I got a genuine laugh out of Sting's Cage Match comment and that was it.

Back from break we get a replay of Vamp getting the crap beaten out of him minus all the comments, then onto our next match.

Shawn "The Perfect One" Stasiak vs Corporal Cajun
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: We get a replay from Monday when Hennig helped Stasiak get the win over Rection. I guess MIA is just employed again for... some reason, and even commentary is confused. Lash gets the mic and says that ever since he's been there, he's been called the Ragin' Cajun, the Ayatollah of Shrimp-creola (or something like that), and even the Stooge from Baton-Rouge, but from now on he's Corporal Cajun, and that MIA has one mission, and I think he says "let the good times roll" in French, but through this whole promo he keeps getting audio issues. Hennig makes hi way out before the match starts and he joins commentary.
Right hands by Stasiak, sending Cajun off the ropes, goes for a press slam but Cajun slips out, rolls up Stasiak for a 2 count. Hennig denies helping Stasiak on Nitro as Cajun pushes Stasiak into the corner and goes for another roll up but Stasiak holds onto the top rope. Stasiak sends Cajun into the corner, tries to go up and catch Stasiak in a headscissor but gets slammed into the mat instead. Stasiak stomping away now, and right hands in the corner, and we find out Hennig is responsible for Cajun getting his job back, Stasiak stomping away now. Gutwrench powerbomb on Cajun, cover and a near fall.
Cajun tossed to the outside, then face first into the guard rail, then the announce table. Back in the ring, Stasiak goes up top with a flying clothesline, cover but Cajun gets his foot on the rope. Cajun sent off the ropes, kick to the face but gets tossed up and over to the walkway, landing on his feet. Forearm to the face by Cajun, goes up top and nails a missile dropkick. Stasiak sent off the ropes with a back body drop. Shake rattle and roll by Cajun, but Stasiak ducks the last shot only to be sent to the outside. Stasiak whipped into the guard rail now, stumbling around ringside, and as Cajun follows, Hennig picks him up and drops him face first on the announce table. Cajun gets tossed back in the ring, Stasiak hits the Hennig-plex and wins in 3:11. Commentary are as confused as I am.

MIA rush the ring and Hennig escapes through the ropes, while Stasiak escapes up the walkway.

Now to the back where Russo is with Liz, and he says as he sees things, it's Liz 3, Russo nothing, and that he's getting a real New York ass kicking. He says that maybe he respects Liz today a little more than he did yesterday, and maybe even underestimated her, but more importantly she has underestimated him, that this is a fight she can't win and he will beat her. Tonight he's going to throw another challenge, and it's not going to be the mental Daffney, it's gonna be that big cow Rhonda Sing, and once again if she can somehow beat the "300 lb bison" as Russo calls her, she's free from Russo, then tells her he made her outfit more "New York-ish" as she leaves into commercial.

Back from break, we go back to the Russo/David saga, and they're walking down the street and suddenly Daffney gets all excited for a Statue of Liberty store display and she thinks it's the real one, but Crowbar points out that every time he's ever seen it it's been in the middle of water. Russo tells them they just move it around every day to give everybody a piece of the old lady. 

Rhonda Sing vs Elizabeth (w/ R&B Security)
If Liz wins, she's free form Russo.
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: We get a replay of what happened with Medusa and Mona from Nitro.
Rhonda grabs her and shoves her into the corner and gets a break in the ropes. Rhonda shoves the ref and Liz lightly pushes her away, until Rhoda slams into the corner. She just pins Liz in the corner with her ass until the ref forces the break. Luger comes in before Rhonda can do any more, trying to tell him to move out of the way. She charges, ducks a clothesline, Liz kicks her away and Luger gets her in the Rack, and the ref calls for the bell. I assume Rhonda wins by DQ in 2:01.

Luger keeps it up until finally dropping her, and he and Liz embrace. Russo sends Palumbo down with a bat, and ends up hitting Liz who's in Luger's arms in the back, then Luger repeatedly in the back and ribs, then we go to break.

Back from commercial, we see Palumbo took Liz's lifeless body to the back during the break, then back to the arena, where Russo is back out, but now with David and Daffney. Russo says he knows everyone's excited to see him, but asks for a moment of silence fo the departed Ric Flair, because on Monday, everyone saw Flair get in his limo, tail between his legs, and told Luger that he's done with the wrestling business. He takes pleasure in saying he broke Ric Flair, so now that Flair's resigned, he's not going to let Ric off the hook that easy, because we don't know the other side of Ric Flair, Ric Flair the father, Ric Flair the monster. He says for 21 years, he tortured his innocent kid David, but have no fear, because now David has a real father he can look up to. He says he promised David the time, and tells him to tell the people the real story of the Nature Boy.

David takes the mic and tells everyone to shut up while he's talking, then calls out to Ric, saying he was never there for him. He says that maybe he did call him from the arena, or the hotel, then tells the fans to shut up while he's talking again. He asks where Ric was on his first day of school, at his first baseball game, when he was at prom, saying Ric wasn't there. He says now it's time to turn the worm, and the crowd start a "you suck" chant, to which he tells them to shut up again. Then brings up a blonde he's got around him, and that it's not too bad for a guy that he never had time for. He says the cat's in the cradle so to say, and that he wants to talk to Ric, but now he doesn't have time for his dad. You know I was starting to like that promo a bit but it got cringy real fast. Russo takes the mic back and says this goes way beyond Ric, because there's another piece of garbage in the back who's just as guilty for the turmoil and trauma David had to go through, Uncle Arn, calling him a piece of crap, then calls him out.

Arn wastes little time making his way out with mic in hand, and Russo tells them to cut his pathetic Horsemen music, then tells Arn to say whatever he has to say quickly. He asks that after what David's done, the best he can come up with is "I'm mad at you Dad," and Russo is the answer to his father. He goes on to say he never met his dad or his mother, and it's not a poor poor pitiful me story, it's to tell him he knows where David's coming from. He tells David that in the back, they call Russo a groupie power, a dangerous combination. He says the reason Russo deals with guys like David and the New Blood is because he can control them, unlike guys like his father, Funk, himself, Luger, Sting, and what he does is get in your head when you're young. He says Russo can tell you a thousand different ways how he can make him, eclipsing Ric Flair. He says he knows how hard it is to be Ric's son, he was his partner for 15 years, and every time he came through ropes, people compared him to Ric, asking if he was worthy to be his partner. He says it was tough, but it made him part of who he is, that's reality. He decides to enlighten David on where Ric was all those times since he was there with him, running up and down those roads 320 days a year, with Ric having anxiety attacks so bad he could barely catch his breath because he couldn't be at David's graduation. He says he's sat in Ric's hotel room many nights with his foot stuck in   bucket of ice and water because his ankle was swollen so bad he couldn't even stand. He says he's seen him with 105 temperature in the morning getting ready for a double shot and would ask how Ric could go to work today, and he would say people like those in the audience there drove 100 miles to see Ric Flair, the World Champion, wrestle. He knows David suffered, and know Ashley and Reid have suffered, but there was something at the end of the rainbow, that the people can tell him about real life, tells him to out in the town and he'll find people sleeping on the streets. He says David never had those problems. all he had to worry about was which college, which private school he's going to, what kind of car he would get.

Russo butts in and says David's heard enough and he doesn't want to hear anymore either. He says that the way they see things is that Arn is full of horse crap, that he comes out with a tale of woe that David doesn't want to hear, then makes it simple. He says he heard Arn say a couple weeks ago that Arn has one good fight left in him, and that one good fight is going to happen tonight, making Arn vs David for later and tonight, they're going to be done with him as well. 

Arn calls him magic man and admits that he can make things happen, and says that he has a friend or two who can lend him a pair of boots and sweats, and tells David like it is, that he ain't the Enforcer no more, but David sure as hell ain't his old man, then leaves as his music hits. 

To the back, Bischoff is with Palumbo... Can't hear a damn thing being said, he does say something about how he doesn't care if it's hardcore but that's it. Then we go outside where a car has pulled up and out comes Hogan into commercial.

Back from break, Bischoff is now with Funk telling him to make it easy on himself, on all his fans and give him the belt back. Bischoff admits to wanting his wrinkled ass out of the company as Funk points it out, and it turns into an argument, Bischoff telling him he has one more match for him tonight, which happens to be right now.

WCW Hardcore Championship: Terry Funk (c) vs "The Main Event" Chuck Palumbo
Palumbo grabs a chair during Funk's entrance and meets him on the walkway, taking Palumbo down with a spear and rolling around a bit. Palumbo up first with a chair to Funk's head, then over the back repeatedly, then throws him at the back of his head before clotheslining him over the ropes. Palumbo pulls out a table now and slides it into the ring, setting it up in the corner as Funk gets up, then thrown through it and kicked to the outside.
Palumbo with ax handle of the apron, Funk fights back with left hands, then Palumbo face first into the guard rail and thrown into the crowd. More lefts by Funk as they fight through the crowd and thrown back over the rail by the entrance and to the back. Face first into equipment cases, then a broom across the back and head of Palumbo. Trash cans over the heads. Another trash can to the head and to the outside. Funk with left hands, then face first into a metal railing. Palumbo tries to scoop slam him over the railing to the ground but Luger attacks from behind, Palumbo face first into a couple of doors then into a dumpster. Funk hits him with a trash can as Luger walks away, covers and retains the title in 4:24. I mean they did the best they could.

Luger comes back and grabs Palumbo as Funk walks off with right hands until security come in, stopping him with mace to the face, cuffing him. They back off so Palumbo can toy with him, throwing Lex into a garage door, shouting that he's the main event.

We see Hogan with Horace walk in the back and that's up next.

Back from break, we see Nash exiting a limo, while just behind him Norman and Ralphus are on the street corner looking to be booked for food. Then to the arena for our match.

Billy Kidman (w/ Torrie Wilson, Eric Bischoff, Konnan, Juventud Guerrera and Rey Mysterio) vs Horace Hogan
If Horace loses, he's fired. If Hulk interferes before the closing bell, Horace is fired on the spot.
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: Eric gets a mic and says he loves the crowd as they boo him, telling Kidman they forced them into this. He says Hulk and Horace forced them to this point, and assures him, the future of sports entertainment around the globe, if Hogan steps one of his big feet in the ring before the bell, Horace will be fired on the spot, and banish him to some remote island where he will be wrestling pygmies for the rest of his miserable, bald-headed life.
Kidman immediately on the attack as Horace enters the ring, whips Kidman across the ring into a slam, then a splash in the corner. Kicks to the midsection, chops, whipped across the ring into a clothesline. More chops by Horace, Kidman across the ring and another clothesline by Horace, and I guess Kidman is selling being knocked around silly, swinging wildly and ends up decking the referee. He goes to call for the bell, but Eric gets on the mic and says it's No DQ. Horace clotheslines Kidman to the outside.
Horace gets a chair and cracks Kidman over the back, then goes after Bischoff, who gets back on the mic and threatens to fire him, Kidman takes advantage of the distraction to dropkick the chair into Horace's face. Kidman has trouble picking up Horace, so Bischoff now makes it a Falls Count Anywhere Match. Kidman makes the cover but Horace kicks out at 2. Back in the ring, Kidman with a slingshot leg drop from the apron, Horace reverses a whip off the ropes, Kidman goes through the legs but walks right into a big boot. Horace with mounted right hands, and Bischoff gets panicked and now makes it a handicap match. Horace lays out the Filthy Animals until Konnan takes him out with a rolling suplex. Now Juvie with a... People's Elbow? Rey now with a Bronco Buster. They drag Horace to the middle as Kidman goes up top with an elbow drop but Horace kicks out. Horace sent off the ropes, but catches Kidman with a Death Valley Driver, makes the pin and wins in...
Oh goodie, another rule change, and now it's a Texas Deathmatch, which means now Kidman has to make it back to his feet at a count of 10 or Horace wins. Kidman makes it back up at 9, Horace now kicks in the corner to the midsection, then rights. Eric comes in from behind and nails Horace in the back with a chair. Konnan and Juvie stomping away, Konnan with rights. Bischoff gets the mic again and now it's an "I Quit" match. Eric lays beside Horace now and says he has a better idea than firing Horace when he loses, after the heart he's displayed, he's too valuable to lose, so now they're going to create an opportunity for Horace to work with the premiere wrestling organization in the world, WCW and the New Blood. Horace spits in his face, then tells them to pin that piece of crap despite the fact they just made it an "I Quit" match, they dog pile, the ref counts three and it's suddenly a regular handicap match because that's it, it's over in 6:17 as Eric calls the referee a moron. 

Hogan's music hits now and Eric escapes, Hogan clearing everyone out of the ring. Eric tries to sneak in with a chair and hits Hogan over the back but he no sells, so Eric drops it and escapes fast. Hogan follows and Kidman comes back in to go after Horace, and the est of the Filthy Animals join in. Rey with a chair to the head and now Nash's music hits and out he comes with a baseball bat. They all bail and now Russo's music hits and out he comes. He says Kevin is alone at last, that he got Nash's message from Monday, and he's got his balls and is standing right there. He asks Kevin how many brain cells has he burnt over the years, throwing out his numerous stupid gimmicks, Vinnie Vegas, Oz, and when he was  Big Daddy Cool in WWF, he asks who put the cool in Big Daddy Cool. He tells Nash not to worry, and that he will make Nash cool again. 

OK I don't know who's fault this was, but it's fucking great. Suddenly, "blood" drops from the ceiling, but it completely misses Nash, and commentary don't know what to say as Nash just looks on. Nash does get splattered a little but... that was great and we go to commercial.

Back from break Russo and Bischoff escape to their limo outside and Hogan's there, smashing in the windows with Nash.

We cut back to the arena for our next match.

"The Enforcer" Arn Anderson vs David Flair (w/ Daffney)
Lock up to start and Arn toys with David a little with a brief arm lock before shoving him away. Another lock up, Arn with a side headlock, shoved off the ropes and David goes for an arm drag but Arn blocks and takes him down. David now with right hands and knees in the corner, now Arn with rights, David face first in the corner. David with rights and chops, then mocks the Flair strut. Arn turns it around with more rights. Crowbar runs in, Arn ducks a clothesline and hits the Spinebuster. Daffney in now, he grabs her by the hair, back elbow on David, low blow by Daffney, David with the Liberty mini-statue over the head. David locks in the figure 4 before throwing the ref out of the ring. Crowbar with a leg drop, a few rights, counts the three since Arn is knocked out, but of course he's not a referee so the bell doesn't ring, but David's music does hit. Arn was busted open on the top of his head it looks like the hard way, and I guess this is over in a no contest? In... roughly 2:23.

They look on pleased before we go to commercial.

Back from break, I guess we need another "Russo brainwashes David" vignette where they're at a toy store I think, and Russo promises to buy him a giant Teletubby of his very own for his bedroom. Daffney is all excited, then they start to play on one of those big floor pianos, then a toy lightsaber battle with some kid before David goes after him with a crowbar, but Russo steps in, saying he can't do that, that he's a New York kid, that he probably has a rap sheet the size of War and Peace. 

Then we get a replay of the finish to the previous match. Now Rick Steiner come out and we get a replay of him turning on Scott, then Goldberg's truck running over their car. Rick gets a mic and says there's two things that don't mean anything to the wrestling world anymore: "Who's next?" and Goldberg. He calls out to Goldberg, and says that the man he's about to bring out ain't flashy or pretty, but will knock him out. He says Goldberg isn't 100% anymore, he has a weakness, so whenever he decides to step in that ring, this man will knock him out, that man of course being Tank Abbott, who makes his way out to Goldberg's music and entrance, the soon to be World Heavyweight Champion as Rick says.

Rick back on the mic now turns to Scott, and says that what he tried to do on Nitro was get him from getting fired, and is sick of coming out and keeping Scott out of trouble, that he's had to keep him out of trouble his whole life, and Scott had it coming. He brings up how a year ago Scott decided to join the NWO and turned on Rick, and how Rick told him he'd never forget it and would pay him back one day, and now they're even.

Tank takes the mic and talks to Goldberg now and says for running his car over, he's going to run Goldberg's ass over, asking when he's going to come out of hiding while calling him a piece of garbage. He says he'll give Goldberg a whooping just like his mom did when he was a youngin'. 

Tank tells him to bring it on and calls out anyone in the back, and out come Kronic with the tag titles. One of them says they're real impressed with their shooting backgrounds, but what they can't stand anymore is them shooting their mouths off. Rick tells them if they want some to come get some, if they don't like him, to bite him. The one Kronic member has a better idea, to go down their and shoot their boots right up their asses, and down to the ring they go.

They start to go at it in adjacent corners until Buff and Shane rush down for 4 on 2 and the numbers start to get them. Shane and Buff run off with their titles back while Kronic go at it with Rick and Tank, until R&B Security come down, trying to hold back Scott and lays them all out. Rick makes his escape and he and Kronic continue taking out security. Tank and Rick laugh on from the stage, taking a seat and enjoying the show. Then we see Goldberg's truck running over their car again on the big screen behind them before we get the full picture and into commercial.

Back from break, we get another David brainwashing vignette, where Russo suggest they go to MSG just down the road. David whispers in his ear that he wants to marry, well presumably Daffney, but he just says "her." I guess they're outside an expensive building as he says he won't be able to afford one until he becomes a true New Yorker, and that he can't wait any longer, getting down on a knee and proposes. She screams and says yes and says she loves him.

Back to the arena, it's time for our main event.

Ambulance Match: "The Career Killer" Mike Awesome vs Sting
Pre-Match Notes & Thoughts: We get a replay of Awesome throwing Kanyon off the cage on Sunday, then putting Page through the table on Nitro. We see the Nitro pulling up beside the stage as Sting makes his way out, and there's only about 4 minutes left in this show.
Awesome right away takes Sting into the corner with rights, whips him across the ring and hits a splash. Awesome pulls a table out and tosses it onto the walkway as Sting rolls out onto it, dropkicking it back into Awesome's face. Sting with a double stomp into the table into Awesome, then leans the table against the ropes on the walkway, sending Awesome through it with a back body drop. Sting sends Awesome up the walkway with right hands, then Mike with some of his own up beside the ambulance. They both go off the side of the stage into the ambulance. Awesome into the side of the ambulance and now they go on top of the ambulance. Awesome picks him up for a powerbomb but Sting slips out and nails the Scorpion Deathdrop on the roof of the ambulance. 
Sting climbs down and opens up the back and out comes Vampiro, spraying red mist in his face then throwing Sting in. He climbs in with him and closes the ambulance doors, giving Awesome the win in 3:17.

Awesome's still out cold on top of the ambulance as it drives out of the arena to the back, and... that's it. Last shot we get is the ambulance driving into the backstage area and it fades to black a few seconds later.

OVERALL THOUGHTS
Well... I mean it was just another mess. We did get a good Cruiserweight Title match, and Stasiak/Cajun was OK for what it was, but then you had the awkward Vamp interview, the barely a main event, unnecessarily having two Hardcore Title matches, the shit with Liz and Russo... It just doesn't end. That said, with a run time of 1:31:41, there was a total 29:46 of wrestling on this show.